My little family and I have a unique living arrangement, one that doesn’t allow us a ton of personal space since we share a house with my parents. I have learned over the course of us living together that I need to have a space of my own, one where I can be completely myself (maybe that’s why I also needed a space on the internet). My bedroom is that one space in the house for me. It is where I do a majority of my writing and journaling, where I most often read. It is becoming my safe haven, away from distraction and noise and other people (being the introvert that I am, this is vital).
I am in the process of creating space for my writing to grow- physical, mental, and emotional space- and figuring out what exactly that looks like. When this year started and I joined Coffee+ Crumbs Year of Creativity course, I wanted something that would help me feel like a writer, help me take this next year seriously and help spark some creativity. My husband and I were able to get me a computer and a desk and I was able to set up a corner of our bedroom just for me. Though I do most of my writing in my bed, just having a physical space that I know I can come to is more freeing than I would have imagined. A space that I have set up to inspire me and make me want to write.
I am still working on creating mental and emotional space to really dig deep into writing. I know that I hold back, that I don’t feel completely comfortable opening up and being free with my voice (I am still trying to find my voice) and my words. I have that same problem even when I am not writing and it is something that I am dedicating this year to figuring out how to solve. I still deal with a lot of fear and self-doubt calling myself a writer, imposter syndrome is such a real issue. Even though writing is just a hobby, for now, it is something I want to dedicate time to. My writing time is the only alone time I get as a stay at home mom, the only time I have to really think and process. In order to create more mental and emotional space, I need to make this a priority.
That’s my goal for this year: to figure out how to make myself and my lofty dreams a priority. How to feel comfortable being something I don’t yet believe I am- a writer. And try to find my true, authentic voice. I’m creating space so that I can stretch out and be comfortable- comfortable with my voice, my ideas, how I form my thoughts and how I put them into the world.
I’m creating space so that I can grow.